Halloween in ‘Wan, 2015

This was the first year in many, many years that I remember being really pumped about Halloween. I cycled through a lot of ideas like “sexy gumball machine” (wut) and “50 Shades of Grey” (can you just dress up as a whole movie?) before the best idea I’ve ever had came to me. This year, I was a T-cup.

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Get it? Actually, I was really surprised at how many people got it right away and how many more thought it was really funny. I wa surprised/shocked at how many friends of mine, really mild-mannered married types, thought it was definitely okay to start tugging at my teacups. Not that I didn’t expect some lewd comments-I did it for the dirty jokes!-but buddies getting handsy was a bit too far.
One female dummy ripped off my lefy cup about ten minutes into the evening. Thankfully, it was nothing that couldn’t be fixed with a stapler, but what the hell?
Also, a dude bought me a beer. He basically looked at my teacups and paid for the beer I was ordering. That rarely happened when I was younger and cuter, and that hasn’t happened in years at this point. Also, I drunkenly messed up someone’s pool shot and was apologizing as profusely as possible when he said, “I think we can give you a pass”, wink wink. Really, the only other time I have gotten that much attention was when I was about 40 pounds thinner and like ten years younger, and that lasted like all of one summer.
We celebrated J’s birthday on Saturday, too, but lost a crowd of people after the restaurant, then a crowd after the first bar…then got a new crowd of hardcore partiers at our last stop.
At some point late in the evening, I made the very drunk decision to pee whilst squatting above the trough in the men’s room. I almost fell in before I got my aim right, but the guy next to me wqs cheering me on. He was really encouraging. Definitely Canadian. I had to tell J about it, and he just shook his head. No one else could be married to me, I’m sure.
We pulled an Irish exit around 2:30 and got some street snacks, went home and watched some more Golden Girls.
I’ll post some directions about the T-cup costume later, if anyone is interested. I tried to take some photos while it was under construction, but really I was making it up as I went along.

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